These lines were written by Joni Mitchell, and I think they are beautiful and incredibly sad. They incapsulate my feelings right now...
Just before our love got lost
you said
I am as constant as a northern star
And I said, constant in the darkness
Wheres that at?
If you want me Ill be in the bar
On the back of a cartoon coaster
In the blue tv screen light
I drew a map of Canada
Oh Canada
And your face sketched on it twice
Oh you are in my blood like holy wine
Oh and you taste so bitter but you taste so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you
I could drink a case of you darling
And I would still be on my feet
Oh Id still be on my feet
Oh I am a lonely painter
I live in a box of paints
Im frightened by the devil
And Im drawn to those ones that aint afraid
I remember that time that you told me, you said
Love is touching souls
Surely you touched mine
Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time
Oh you are in my blood like holy wine
And you taste so bitter but you taste so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you
I could drink a case of you darling
Still Id be on my feet
And still be on my feet
I met a woman
She had a mouth like yours
She knew your life
She knew your devils and your deeds
And she said
Color go to him, stay with him if you can
Oh but be prepared to bleed
Oh but you are in my blood
youre my holy wine
Oh and you taste so bitter, bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you darling
Still Id be on my feet
Id still be on my feet
Friday, June 29, 2007
The End of an Era
I am sure there are some of you that have fallen over to see that I have posted here...but things have been a bit stressed lately.
It is with great sadness that I report that I am no longer The Boyfriend...yes, it is true...I am single again.
Through no fault of either of us, we have decided to part ways. It is for the best, but that does not mean that there is not a great deal of heart break and pain involved.
Some of you may be able to relate to this: you can love somebody with your entire soul, and know that you are not good for them. You can love a person, and know that you are not what they need, and they are not what you need. There is no fault in that-it is what it is.
The worst thing any person can do is to be unhappy. Life is far too short.
So...we pick up the pieces and go on. Or try to at least.
I gave a great deal of thought to whether or not I should change the name of the blog, delete it all, and forget about it. I decided to leave it as it is, and to continue to add select messages. Why not? Writing is supposed to have a cathartic effect, so I am going to use this forum to express the inner turmoil I am experiencing. We will see what happens...
One question that I will throw out to the blog universe is this:
How do you fall in love with someone that is completely incompatible for you?
I have been wrestling with this concept for an age now...clever and mysterious are the workings of the heart I suppose.
I should warn readers that some of my subsequent posts may have harsh concepts, bitterness, and vitriol involved...
Guess that is what purging is for.
More on all of this later
It is with great sadness that I report that I am no longer The Boyfriend...yes, it is true...I am single again.
Through no fault of either of us, we have decided to part ways. It is for the best, but that does not mean that there is not a great deal of heart break and pain involved.
Some of you may be able to relate to this: you can love somebody with your entire soul, and know that you are not good for them. You can love a person, and know that you are not what they need, and they are not what you need. There is no fault in that-it is what it is.
The worst thing any person can do is to be unhappy. Life is far too short.
So...we pick up the pieces and go on. Or try to at least.
I gave a great deal of thought to whether or not I should change the name of the blog, delete it all, and forget about it. I decided to leave it as it is, and to continue to add select messages. Why not? Writing is supposed to have a cathartic effect, so I am going to use this forum to express the inner turmoil I am experiencing. We will see what happens...
One question that I will throw out to the blog universe is this:
How do you fall in love with someone that is completely incompatible for you?
I have been wrestling with this concept for an age now...clever and mysterious are the workings of the heart I suppose.
I should warn readers that some of my subsequent posts may have harsh concepts, bitterness, and vitriol involved...
Guess that is what purging is for.
More on all of this later
Friday, May 11, 2007
Does It Really Exist?
In my reading of blogs out there, I have noticed that most tend to discuss their day, or what they are reading, or what movies they have seen. While I intend to use this forum for just such discussions as well, this post has a much different slant. Please bear with me while I lay the foundation for a philosophical question I have been wondering about.
One of my favorite movies is West Side Story, which is based on the Shakespeare tragedy of Romeo and Juliet. For those of you that aren't familiar with the story: two people of opposite ethnic/social/religious backgrounds find each other and fall in love. Knowing they can never be together within the confines of their families, they decide to run away. Fate, of course, intervenes, and the end of the story is that one or both of them ends up dead.
I know-how cheery a topic!
What compels me most about the story itself is the utter abandon the two exhibit with their feelings. They are shy and timid when they first meet, but they realize that something magical is happening between them. Once they let themselves be swept up in the emotion of it all, there is nothing that will separate them-both physically and spiritually.
As evidenced by the famous lyric-Only death will part us now.
Little did they know how true that would turn out to be...right?
Granted, there have been countless movies/books/songs written about love, but in my opinion, none capture the pure joy and passion of Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story.
Now, having been in long term relationships, I understand that life gets in the way, and passion that "burns with the fire of 1000 suns" does not last in the midst of dirty laundry, burned dinners, and recycling that needs to be dealt with, but is it really life that gets in the way?
As eluded to in the title of this post-Does the kind of love that makes Romeo and Juliet so powerful really exist?
If you think you have an answer-let me know-DH
One of my favorite movies is West Side Story, which is based on the Shakespeare tragedy of Romeo and Juliet. For those of you that aren't familiar with the story: two people of opposite ethnic/social/religious backgrounds find each other and fall in love. Knowing they can never be together within the confines of their families, they decide to run away. Fate, of course, intervenes, and the end of the story is that one or both of them ends up dead.
I know-how cheery a topic!
What compels me most about the story itself is the utter abandon the two exhibit with their feelings. They are shy and timid when they first meet, but they realize that something magical is happening between them. Once they let themselves be swept up in the emotion of it all, there is nothing that will separate them-both physically and spiritually.
As evidenced by the famous lyric-Only death will part us now.
Little did they know how true that would turn out to be...right?
Granted, there have been countless movies/books/songs written about love, but in my opinion, none capture the pure joy and passion of Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story.
Now, having been in long term relationships, I understand that life gets in the way, and passion that "burns with the fire of 1000 suns" does not last in the midst of dirty laundry, burned dinners, and recycling that needs to be dealt with, but is it really life that gets in the way?
As eluded to in the title of this post-Does the kind of love that makes Romeo and Juliet so powerful really exist?
If you think you have an answer-let me know-DH
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
The Podcast is LIVE!
So...last I posted-I was telling you about being a special guest on the Loopyfruit podcast. The session is now live and ready for your listening pleasure!
I thought it was incredibly fun, but I was horrified to hear my own voice. I am SUCH a FAG!
Oh well-I have embraced it about myself, but sometimes it is rattling to confront that sort of thing...catch my drift?
One observation-my boyfriend recorded his podcast, and his word of choice was FABULOUS, and when I recorded my podcast, my word of choice was AMAZING!
(Do the words I use make me sound gay?)
There is a chance that my boyfriend and I will be starting a podcast of our own, and we are pondering the name "Amazing and Fabulous: Do these GENES make me look gay?" (must credit the spelling of the word genes to my boyfriend)
Let us know what you think about that...
I thought it was incredibly fun, but I was horrified to hear my own voice. I am SUCH a FAG!
Oh well-I have embraced it about myself, but sometimes it is rattling to confront that sort of thing...catch my drift?
One observation-my boyfriend recorded his podcast, and his word of choice was FABULOUS, and when I recorded my podcast, my word of choice was AMAZING!
(Do the words I use make me sound gay?)
There is a chance that my boyfriend and I will be starting a podcast of our own, and we are pondering the name "Amazing and Fabulous: Do these GENES make me look gay?" (must credit the spelling of the word genes to my boyfriend)
Let us know what you think about that...
Monday, May 7, 2007
LoopyFruit.com Special Guest!
As you all know-my wonderful boyfriend was the special guest on a podcast recently-Loopyfruit.com. He was breathless with excitement when he recorded, and the result was classic him-very funny and charming
Well-this past Saturday, I had the honor and pleasure of recording a podcast session with them. Can I just tell you-it was AMAZING!
We laughed, we cried-we did our nails....
I will be back with more when the podcast is posted-DH
Well-this past Saturday, I had the honor and pleasure of recording a podcast session with them. Can I just tell you-it was AMAZING!
We laughed, we cried-we did our nails....
I will be back with more when the podcast is posted-DH
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
A STAR IS BORN!
For those of you who do not know...which I presume is all of you-I have decided to take voice lessons. I love to sing, and usually do it in the car-windows open, as I belt out whichever part of the score to "Sunset Boulevard" I happen to like at the moment. I could be Norma Desmond, Joe-the writer, or a clueless background singer letting us know that an apartment with no roaches would be her Hollywood dream. Makes no difference to me.
I really wanted to find out what my range is, as well as what my voice can do, so I registered at the Old Town School of Folk Music for Vocal Techniques I.
Last night was the first meeting-and I am SO VERY EXCITED about it.
There are 15 of us in the class, and we all looked at eachother tentatively as we began, but slowly we lost our nerves and just let things happen.
The instructor asked us to discuss why we were taking the class, what sorts of music we are into, and if we had any musical background. Here were my answers to these various inquiries:
WHY?-so I can learn my range and see what my voice can do
WHAT?-pretty much anything
MUSICAL BACKGROUND-none
I also informed her that the real reason for my taking lessons was to BECOME A CABARET ACT!!!!!
There was not much singing yesterday-but we did discuss breathing (diaphragmatic and intercostal breathing), how your vocal chords work, and how to create vowel sounds to strengthen the voice. She also stressed relaxation and using the body in order to create strong sound...very interesting!
I will keep you all posted on how it goes...by the way-if you have any suggestions as to what numbers should be included in my cabaret set, feel free to pass them along!-DH
I really wanted to find out what my range is, as well as what my voice can do, so I registered at the Old Town School of Folk Music for Vocal Techniques I.
Last night was the first meeting-and I am SO VERY EXCITED about it.
There are 15 of us in the class, and we all looked at eachother tentatively as we began, but slowly we lost our nerves and just let things happen.
The instructor asked us to discuss why we were taking the class, what sorts of music we are into, and if we had any musical background. Here were my answers to these various inquiries:
WHY?-so I can learn my range and see what my voice can do
WHAT?-pretty much anything
MUSICAL BACKGROUND-none
I also informed her that the real reason for my taking lessons was to BECOME A CABARET ACT!!!!!
There was not much singing yesterday-but we did discuss breathing (diaphragmatic and intercostal breathing), how your vocal chords work, and how to create vowel sounds to strengthen the voice. She also stressed relaxation and using the body in order to create strong sound...very interesting!
I will keep you all posted on how it goes...by the way-if you have any suggestions as to what numbers should be included in my cabaret set, feel free to pass them along!-DH
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
FORGIVE THE DELAY!!!
Yes, I am still among the living!
I have been crazy busy with life, and finally-after some much needed prodding from some fellow bloggers, I am back to say...HEY (said with requiste hip lean and snap, of course)
There will be more later, as I wanted to discuss my upcoming birthday! Until then-later gater-DH
I have been crazy busy with life, and finally-after some much needed prodding from some fellow bloggers, I am back to say...HEY (said with requiste hip lean and snap, of course)
There will be more later, as I wanted to discuss my upcoming birthday! Until then-later gater-DH
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
The Cult of Personality
Hello to all! I must say-I am overwhelmed by the reaction to my having a blog...thank you to all that have sent comments to me.
I fretted about what my next installment would entail, and I finally decided I wanted to ask a few questions, as well as give you a view into my twisted view of life.
As a preface, I must say that last night we (Michael and I) were watching the video of Anna Nicole Smith painted up to look like Pennywize the Clown, as well as photos of Britney Spears shearing her dyed locks. My first question is 2-fold:
(A) Do we really care that much that mediocre singers are walking around bald?
and-if the answer to that question is yes, then
(B) Why?
While I would love to say that I am "above all of that", and look with distain at the National Enquirer-I have to admit, I am as engaged as everyone else in the mayhem...there is something comforting in the idea that there are people in the world that are MORE UNSTABLE THAN I THINK I AM!
My personal view is that we love to see the tragi-comedy of Anna Nicole Smith, Britney Spears, and their ilk because we see a bit of us in it all-the desperate need to be recognized, the struggle to erase the idea that we LOVE green bean casserole with Durkee's Fried onions on top. In them we see us sitting in front of the television shoveling in generic Wheat Thins with spray cheese....desperate to find out if the latest contestant will succeed on Deal Or No Deal!
A few other questions to put out there for discussion/comment/debate would be:
Why is it that you never see Michael Jackson and LaToya Jackson in the same room?
(My opinion-they are the SAME PERSON)
Is plastic surgery worth distorting your look so much that people think you look like a skinned cat?
Does Clay Aiken REALLY need to come out? Don't we all know the answer already?
As Linda Richmond would say (with press-on nails flaired dramatically)...DISCUSS!
I fretted about what my next installment would entail, and I finally decided I wanted to ask a few questions, as well as give you a view into my twisted view of life.
As a preface, I must say that last night we (Michael and I) were watching the video of Anna Nicole Smith painted up to look like Pennywize the Clown, as well as photos of Britney Spears shearing her dyed locks. My first question is 2-fold:
(A) Do we really care that much that mediocre singers are walking around bald?
and-if the answer to that question is yes, then
(B) Why?
While I would love to say that I am "above all of that", and look with distain at the National Enquirer-I have to admit, I am as engaged as everyone else in the mayhem...there is something comforting in the idea that there are people in the world that are MORE UNSTABLE THAN I THINK I AM!
My personal view is that we love to see the tragi-comedy of Anna Nicole Smith, Britney Spears, and their ilk because we see a bit of us in it all-the desperate need to be recognized, the struggle to erase the idea that we LOVE green bean casserole with Durkee's Fried onions on top. In them we see us sitting in front of the television shoveling in generic Wheat Thins with spray cheese....desperate to find out if the latest contestant will succeed on Deal Or No Deal!
A few other questions to put out there for discussion/comment/debate would be:
Why is it that you never see Michael Jackson and LaToya Jackson in the same room?
(My opinion-they are the SAME PERSON)
Is plastic surgery worth distorting your look so much that people think you look like a skinned cat?
Does Clay Aiken REALLY need to come out? Don't we all know the answer already?
As Linda Richmond would say (with press-on nails flaired dramatically)...DISCUSS!
Monday, February 19, 2007
The Boyfriend Says...Part 1
Hello to the blog world!
For those of you who are unfamiliar, my boyfriend Michael (or probably better known as What Is A Boy To Do?) has been blogging (is that a true verb?) for quite awhile now, and this is my first attemp to join in the frolic!
When reading his entries, I was always stuck with the idea that I was referred to as "The Boyfriend", as if I was a chair or some other inanimate object strewn about the house. It was this feeling that prompted him to create a blog page for me...so, here I am.
Not sure what I am going to discuss, or how this is going to be received, but at the very least, the world can now be certain that THE BOYFRIEND DOES EXIST!
For those of you who are unfamiliar, my boyfriend Michael (or probably better known as What Is A Boy To Do?) has been blogging (is that a true verb?) for quite awhile now, and this is my first attemp to join in the frolic!
When reading his entries, I was always stuck with the idea that I was referred to as "The Boyfriend", as if I was a chair or some other inanimate object strewn about the house. It was this feeling that prompted him to create a blog page for me...so, here I am.
Not sure what I am going to discuss, or how this is going to be received, but at the very least, the world can now be certain that THE BOYFRIEND DOES EXIST!
Friday, February 16, 2007
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